…if not the last several years…
Between me and a friend of mine, whom I shall call “Numbnuts” to protect his identity.
Numbnuts (10:17:37 PM): Dude I had the gnarliest dream ever
Me (10:17:51 PM): (corpulent middle aged mutual male friend) vacuuming naked?
Numbnuts (10:17:53 PM): last night I dreamt that someone bet me $10k that I wouldn’t cut off my nipple
Numbnuts (10:17:58 PM): and for some reason, in the dream
Numbnuts (10:18:05 PM): I thought that it wouldn’t hurt or anything
Numbnuts (10:18:13 PM): so I had one of those little pruning shears
Numbnuts (10:18:25 PM): and I reached down and cut off my left nipple
Numbnuts (10:18:41 PM): and this gigantic lightning bolt shot out of it
Numbnuts (10:18:46 PM): and blew a hole in the wall
Numbnuts (10:18:57 PM): It freaked me out so much that I woke up and called my brother
Numbnuts (10:19:08 PM): and then went back to sleep and forgot about it
Me (10:19:16 PM): WOW
Numbnuts (10:19:22 PM): I just remembered it again just now because he called me telling me how fucked up I was
Numbnuts (10:19:33 PM): and I had to spend an hour talking to him convincing him I wasn’t using again
Me (10:19:39 PM): HAHA
Numbnuts (10:19:42 PM): Blue lightning bolt!